TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria.
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TEACHER: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile"?
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L.
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday, you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't
have ten years ago. WINNIE : Me!
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TEACHER: Gus, why do you always get so dirty?
GUS : 'Cause I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I".
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am".
MILLIE : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet".
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his
father didn't punish him?
LOUIS : Because George still had the ax in his hand.
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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to. My Mom's a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your
brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog.
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.
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